‘New Girl’ Schmidt Quotes: 10 Wittiest Lines From ‘New Girl’s’ Resident Perfectionist [PHOTOS]

In the hit series 'New Girl', Schmidt (Max Greenfield) is known as the perfectionist guy who opts to clean and decorate the loft based on his unreasonably high standards. Despite his narcissism, his witty and sarcastic quotes have endeared him to fans.

"Can you believe the zoo wouldn't let me borrow their white tiger? I mean, the nerve! Philip Seymour Hoffman is going to be sitting at the back of the party, thinkin, 'Look at that guy. He couldn't even get a big cat.'"

Schmidt mentioned this on 'New Girl's' Season 2 Episode 1 "Re-Launch". After a surgery which left him in a genital cast, Schmidt decided to have a comeback party just in time for the cast's removal. Being the competitive man that he is, he wanted his party to be exceptional.

"Know this: your caveman ideas about manhood are so over. Manhood today is about exfoliation, cheese courses, emotional honesty, and Paxil."

During college, Schmidt was overweight. This motivated him to work out and in the process, change his concepts of manhood.

"Nick is delicate. Like a flower. Like a chubby, damaged flower who hates himself."

Schmidt appears to be pertaining to his former self when he said this line. Nonetheless, it does not change the fact that he is an attentive best friend to Nick.

"I had figure skating lessons until I was 13, and then my mom sobered up and realized I was a boy."

Apart from oftentimes telling about his competitive childhood household, Schmidt likewise uses his Jewish heritage as a reference for a couple of scenes.

"Damp towel, damp! It's like a really big wet nap. I feel like I'm being licked by a golden retriever. Look at this bathroom. There should not be two girls in this bathroom. You're too humid."

Nick, Jess, and Walter should thank Schmidt for keeping the loft organized despite his tendencies to freak out over mundane things.

"Winston, you've been staring at this girl for 5 minutes. Please tell me you're checking her out, otherwise you're a serial killer. Which would explain a lot."

Deemed as the loft's expert when it comes to girls, Schmidt makes it sure that his fellow housemates are on the right track of dating.

Schmidt: "No sig oths."

Cece: "Just say 'significant others.'"

Schmidt: "Maybe you have that kind of time but I'm on a tight sched."

In the series, Schmidt's greatest love is Jess' supermodel best friend Cece. Even if Cece recognizes her need to acknowledge her Indian heritage by marrying an Indian, Schmidt's funny antics make it difficult for her to move on

"The economy stinks, bees are dying, and movies are pretty much all sequels now."

A classic case of Schmidt expressing his distaste for things that are not at par with his unique standards.

What's your favorite Schmidt line?